You Helped Me
by EvilRegalShandyLvr21
Summary: Rusty realizes something. Is he appreciative? Does he realize the treasure in which he has been given?


BAMDAMMMster Prompt of The Week: ""Bring Me To Life" by Evanescence

This was difficult for me, because the song and I didn't gel, but I gave it my best shot!

 _As usual, I don't own these amazing characters, except the two I created, I am just taking them on a ride! They will be returned to the Duffster!_

Enjoy!

 _ **~~~~~~~ERSL21~~~~~~~**_

" _ **All this time I can't believe I couldn't see."**_

Sitting here in the living room, I can see Sharon and Andy on the balcony enjoying their nightly cup of tea. Watching them feels kind of creepy. We all ate dinner together and I went to my room afterwards, but I forgot my phone on the living room table. I came back to get it and I was captivated by the sight in front of me. They look happy. Happiness is something I never saw, Sharon Beck, experience. Observing their happiness, makes me feel even worse for my earlier actions toward Flynn, at the beginning stages of their relationship. I can't believe I allowed my ill feelings towards him, to block Sharon's happiness. Ill feelings? I don't understand why I have ill feelings towards him. I want to believe Flynn isn't just like all the men, my mom dated and that he would treat me like they did. But, Flynn has shown me time and time again, even when he and Sharon weren't dating, that he is nothing like those other guys. Maybe deep down I am just afraid to Sharon will abandon me, like my mom did. She has never given me the slightest hint, that she would do such thing, but there is always a first time for everything, right? Wait, let me stop thinking like that. I am lucky to have, Sharon. She has helped me become the best person that I can be. She helped me realize that my previous circumstances, do not have to dictate my future. So, why am I letting my past dictate how I feel about, Andy?

As I sit here and think back to the times, Flynn has helped me, I can't believe that I have been such a jerk towards him. Flynn, took me to bus station to pick up, my mom, he never once passed judgement on her or me, for her not showing up. He helped me with understanding the process of recovery, once my mom attempted to remain sober. He is the one who informed, Sharon, that the prescription that my mom, was trying to get was a fake. We have also had many talks about the realities of attempting to get sober and how difficult that can be for the people, in the addict's life. Flynn, has been nothing but helpful to me. The crazy part about it is, I was the one who pointed out to the two, 'idiots,' in the words of Provenza, that they indeed were actually dating. But once, it really became real, it scared me. It scares me not for Sharon, but for me. I know that it is selfish, but I am afraid he will hurt me. I know he will never hurt, Sharon. He loves her too much for that. He would cross an ocean for her. He would climb the highest mountain to get to her. I have spoken to Dr. Joe about my feelings towards, Flynn. He assures me that it is a repressed emotion, towards older men a part of the women I love lives'. I want to trust him, I do, but I don't know how to. I trust he is a great detective. I trust that he is the right guy for Sharon. But I need to trust that he would never do anything to hurt me.

"Rusty?" Sharon says walking back into condo, with red cheeks and appears she has been laughing.

"Uh yeah?" I respond trying to sound normal.

"Are you ok?" She inquires walking up to me.

"Yeah, I was just lost in thought." I assure her.

"Ok." She says walking down the hallway towards the bathroom.

"Hey, kid." Andy says closing the balcony door, and holding their mugs in his other hand.

"Hey." Is all that I can say. Maybe I should talk to him now, after all there is no time like the present, well according to Provenza, there isn't.

I hear him put the mugs in the dishwasher. He walks back into the living room.

"Andy, can we talk for a minute?" I ask hoping that I don't sound brusque.

"Sure, kid. What about?" He says sitting in the chair opposite of me.

"Us." I simply state. He nods his head and sits back in his chair.

"First, I want to say, I am sorry for being such a jerk towards you. I would like you to know, that I know you would never hurt, Sharon. But Sharon, isn't the one I am concerned about. She can take care of herself, she has been doing it for years. As I'm sure she has told you a million times, like she has me…" I say earning a chuckle from him, "I am more concerned with how you will treat me. You are aware of my past, and the horrible things I've experienced. Andy, I need to know that I am safe and secure with you. At one point, I was afraid, I was going to lose, Sharon, because she now has you. But I realized that she would never, put me out of her life. I try my hardest not to compare Sharon, to my biological mom, and over the years I have learned to no longer do that. But this is first time, I've experienced a positive man in Sharon's life, and mine."

Andy takes a deep breath and then responds, "Listen, Rusty, your fears are valid. I understand them and I would hope that I have proven through the years that I want nothing but the best for you. I would never hurt you in any capacity. You not only mean a great deal to Sharon, you mean a great deal to me. I don't say that because you are the woman I love, son. I say that because I have watched you grow into a remarkable young man. To see your evolution with my own eyes, has been amazing. I am proud of you, Rusty. I want nothing but the best for you, and if I can help you achieve it, best believe I will go through hell and high water to make it happen."

Looking into his eyes, I can see that he meant every word he just said. Andy isn't the type to sugar coat the reality of any situation. I think that is why I like him as a person so much. He has never once lied to me. It finally dawns on me.

"Andy, thank you." I rasp quickly.

"You are welcome, kid." He says.

I laugh and praise him, "Thank you for your answer and the truthfulness of it, but I just realized something. You helped in a way that I didn't understand until just now. You helped me realize that my mom's drinking and abuse wasn't my fault. You helped me understand that she has to take responsibility for her actions and that I can only help her if she wants true help and not a pedestal to abuse. Thank you, Andy, you helped mold me into that remarkable young man, you claim I am."

I walk up to him and extend my hand. He stands up and shakes my hand. He taught me, a man is only as strong as his hand shake. Not understanding him, when he first told me. But now that I am older and have wised up a little more, I now understand it better.

"You are welcome, Rusty." He says. I look over his shoulder and I see Sharon leaning against the wall with tears in her eyes.

 _ **~~~~~~~ERSL21~~~~~~~**_

Leave me some nuggets!


End file.
